The river at night was exceptionally cold.
I slowly waded in, the water rising above my head, flooding my nose and lungs. I shivered violently in the water, unsure if it was the cold or my heart that was frozen. But at least it was all over.
When I opened my eyes again, I found myself as a spirit, drifting behind Audrey…
Even in death, I can’t find peace?
How annoying.
I don’t want to see him anymore.
Audrey was sitting by the hospital bed, peeling an apple for my sister Elisha, the two of them laughing and chatting, with no sign of depression.
My mother, giving them space, had quietly exited the room and was now dutifully standing at the door.
Suddenly, a sharp pain shot through my chest. I drifted over to my mother, screaming in her ear, “Mother, do you know that Audrey is your younger daughter’s husband?”
“Why can’t you share even a little of the love you give to Elisha with me? Even just a tiny bit?”
As soon as the words left my mouth, I realized how ridiculous I had just sounded—after all, the living cannot hear the voices of the dead.
Even when I was alive, she couldn’t hear me. How could she now that I’m dead?
A sense of powerlessness enveloped me. Now, I only hope that my body will never be found.
I really don’t want to have anything to do with these people anymore.
Elisha and I are twins. When we were born, Elisha was frail, while I was strong.
Despite the doctors repeatedly explaining that the development of twins is determined by their own genetics, my mother always believed that I had stolen Elisha’s nutrients.
She thought I was born to atone, and I’m the represent of devil, which is why she named me Lilith.
Growing up, anything Elisha wanted, I couldn’t have.
Elisha wanted to learn the piano, so our family sold a house to hire a renowned teacher for her, while I had to delay paying a few hundred for my class fees.
In everything, as soon as I encountered Elisha, I lost before even starting.
She always effortlessly swayed everyone to her side, justly and righteously taking away everything I had.
Elisha was weak as a child, and our family took extra care of her.
Later, when her health improved, she inexplicably developed depression… The whole family started running around for her again. I was always curious—how could someone whose life was so smooth and untroubled develop moderate depression?
It wasn’t until I went to the hospital for a check-up that I found out I was suffering from severe depression.
In that moment, I realized that everyone has their own sickness. Later, whenever someone said to me, “Elisha has depression, why can’t you just let her have her way? Don’t you have any sympathy?”
I found it laughable.
I’m not only severely depressed; I’m also terminally ill—who’s going to feel sorry for me?
It wasn’t until I met Audrey in college that I thought my life was about to change.
But that ray of light in the darkness only pushed me deeper into the abyss.
Elisha was Audrey’s first love, a fact I only discovered after we were married. If I had known earlier, I would have kept my distance from this man.